So in my efforts to catalogue the finest white rappers of all-time, I stumbled across many many photos for each artist and in the process, I have become convinced that Aesop Rock and Matisyahu may in fact be long lost cousins. There are several reasons besides a vague but definite physical resemblance

1) Matisyahu has a gigantic bushy beard that makes him look like a billygoat. Aesop Rock has declared several times on wax that he has a “billygoat beard.”

2) Aesop Rock was born in New York state. Matisyahu was born in New York state.

3) Matisyahu is Jewish. Aesop Rock is from Long Island. Which is like basically the same thing.

4) Matisyahu used to like Phish and follow them around the country, hacky-sacking the nights away and taking acid. Aesop Rock writes songs about acid and has a very hippy hacky-sack loving fanbase.

5) Matisyahu is a white man performing reggae, a predominantly black art form. Aesop Rock is a white man performing hip-hop, a predominantly black art form.

6) Aesop Rock has a song called “Boom Box.” Matisyahu has a song called “Beat Box.”

7) Aesop Rock took his name from a fable. Matisyahu gets his entire identity from fables.

So you see it’s practically a lock. Well, except for the fact that Aesop Rock is dope and Matisyahu sucks. But c’mon…See the picture below. Beards just don’t get that bushy by accident.

Challah If You Hear Me!!

MP3: Matisyahu-“Beat Box”
MP3: Aesop Rock-“Boom Box”

Half-baked conspiracy theories about Aesop Rock and Matisyahu not doing it for you today? Then please check out these fine links, who I can guarantee do not traffic in such wild and ridiculous conspiracy-mongering (Probably).

About Rap lists his top 50 producers of all-time.

Angry Citizen sees the Clipse live.

Notes From a Different Kitchen Names His Favorite Singles From 06

Oh Word and Dallas Penn are the best tag team since Ax and Smash from Demolition. If you haven’t seen their videos from Sundance, you’re missing out.

Check out Very Little Known Facts. These dudes are very funny. And very weird. I respect that.

Aquarium Drunkard has Of Montreal doing a pretty awesome cover of Bowie’s “Moonage Daydream”

Dodge has some Elvis Perkins’ MP3s up. If you haven’t heard any Elvis yet, now’s a good time to start. His debut album comes out on XL on 2/20.


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