April 17, 2012

This single did not make Deen’s life good. 

What the fuck Nasir? For real?

Why do you have to make my internet and barbershop lives so damn hard NasGawd? I can’t get jiggy to this shit. I can’t defend it either – even though the stan in me is desperate to rationalize this shit.

This song was so not the move right now. Why stem the momentum from your last two efforts with this sanctimonious bullshit? I think we the people have made it exceedingly clear over the last two decades that we don’t want to hear this kind of shit from you anymore. Most of us kinda hated the original version, but it grew on us eventually and that’s besides the point.

I guess the point I’m trying to make is that Nas has “paid his dues” and made his statements (or publicity stunts, depending on who’s writing). We all know that he cares or at least tries really hard to make it seem as if he cares. I happen to believe him. So enough with the grand statements and paternalism in the music. Just rap. Preferably about cool shit like Jay and Ricky (and no one seems to hold it against them) because shit like this isn’t going to pay Kelis or the IRS. This isn’t me being a “fanager” and refusing to let Nas grow. He already did this shit (well, I might add) a decade and a half ago. The truth (in my jaundiced opinion) is that “growth” for Nas in 2012 comes in two forms:

  1. Making a creditable effort to make music that people want to knock in cars (for instance, “The Don” —  I’ll admit that this one wasn’t a slam-dunk, but it’s still great) or the clubs (Nas has never really been a club/singles rapper. Never. Even at his commercial peak. “You Owe Me” deserved better from you assholes. So did ‘You Won’t See Me Tonight (ft. Aaliyah), but they didn’t even push that single).
  2. Simply returning to his grimy NY roots and just rapping better than everyone over dusty ass breakbeats. “Nasty” was a perfect example of that shit. He gets less points for doing this since it seems to come so easy to him, but it makes one wonder why doesn’t just do this more often.

Ideally, Nas would make a bunch of happy and morally bankrupt music about being famous, single and “rich”. After all, the album is called Life Is Good, so why not cheer up a bit for once? Fuck black girls. Let them stay lost. That’s the only way guys like me get our appendages wet each weekend. Let their parents make the songs that’ll save them. Or Drake. Just parent your own daughter Mr. Jones. Go hang out with Juicy J or French Montana (read: Harry Fraud) and give us another “Oochie Wally” (fuck what you heard or what Jay said, bitches LOVE this song – especially the lost bitches). If that’s too much at this point in time, then stop recording music until a non-shitty idea occurs to you.

Before I end this rant, let’s try to give this shit a decent listen (watch me talk myself into liking this stupid song. I’m pathetic y’all). Nas is actually in good form: sharp flow intact and interesting (if slightly cliched) vignettes about the kind of girls I pray my enemies run into. Even the amateurish hoodrat on the hook gets a pass upon repeated listens because it works well with the track’s concept – she’s the snotty bitch our rap super hero is scolding. Cool. The beat… well… it… um. Ah fuck it, that beat is dookie. Hit-Boy’s name seems to be attached to this beat, but no one will hold it against him because Nas picked the damn beat.

I know Nas has explained his reasons for selecting certain beats in the past and I personally find the beat criticisms to be lazy and silly, given Nas’ core fan base’s demands on his content, but the shittiness of this particular selection is unbelievable. This has to be Nas’ idea of humor. I mean, why bother doing a session with someone named “HITBOY” if you aren’t even going to try to make a hit? Where’s the psychological sense in that playa? In truth, the beat isn’t really THAT awful (still trying to talk myself into this shit. Still pathetic. I’m sorry y’all), but it’s the principle of the thing that offends me. This shit is like when people let Chris Brown rap (or breathe really) instead of singing. Confusing shit man.

Oh wait. The song is a throwaway? As in it’s not going to be on Nas’ next album? That’s wonderful news. I guess this whole rant was for nothing. That’s cool though. History suggests that I’ll probably have to do this shit all over again in about… well, in about the time it take Nas to drop another single. SMH.

It’s hard being a Nas stan sometimes. Let me go listen to It Was Written again. That always makes me feel better…

MP3: Nas – “Black Girl Lost 2”

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