July 5, 2012

Max Bell was conceived to Juvenile Hell.

A person is smart. People are dumb, panicky dangerous animals and you know it. Fifteen hundred years ago everybody knew the Earth was the center of the universe. Five hundred years ago, everybody knew the Earth was flat, and fifteen minutes ago, you knew that humans were alone on this planet. Imagine what you’ll know tomorrow.” – Tommy Lee Jones as Agent Kay from Men In Black.

That’s probably one of the greatest quotes to ever come from a Will Smith vehicle about aliens financed by a major studio and likely aided by Teutonic investors. Why? Because it called everyone in the theatre “dumb” without a majority of them realizing that it was true. For every one “smart” person, there are probably six hundred and seventy seven ‘dumb’ people (I drop math son). And so, it is for those six hundred and seventy seven that Prodigy has made “Co-Pilot.”

Partnering up with Wiz Khalifa is the rap equivalent of making a sex tape. So now that Wiz and P have crossed swords on this terrible piece of whatever, P is looking to garner some new fans, to get some buzz. I hope he does. And I hope these new fans, if they do end up becoming fans, will go back into P’s catalogue, realize what a mistake they’ve made, and abandon their Wiz fandom like they did Dora the Explorer—when they grew the fuck up.

Fifteen years ago, everybody knew that Prodigy could rap. Five years ago. everybody had a vague notion that Prodigy might end up in prison. And fifteen minutes ago I knew that Prodigy was still a great MC who would remain that way forever. I don’t want to imagine what I’ll know tomorrow.

P.S. If anyone has a Neuralizer, get at me. I may need it after listening H.N.I.C. 3 tomorrow. I hope to Big Baby Jesus (a.k.a. Ol’ Dirty) that I won’t.

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