September 25, 2012

The last time Schoolboy went to church he pulled up in an Audi toting his Glock 40. No one asked any questions. But as Q started to listen to the sermon he saw how thin the preacher looked. So he dipped. Everyone knows bosses get fat.

I understand the intent of the video — Schoolboy and [email protected]!n$ are more “RutHLe$$” than the Klan, they spit in tongues that at least make sense, which is more than anyone can say for those folks down at the Pentecostal church. White people are the devil, etc.  But the video doesn’t really pull it off, which is really too bad. Like most forms of organized worship, it was great in theory.

Though with his shirt off and the bucket hat with the Chanel rag, Schoolboy convinces me, yet again, that he’s swagged out. So he definitely needs your bitch to wipe him down. He also outshines and out-rhymes the guy with way too many symbols in his name.

Awkward transitions fully in sight — on to the track:

The beat is ill. The drums are straight from the boom-bap basement, the strings give it a more cinematic level of import, and the Biggie sample is much appreciated. Now, that’s not to say that Schoolboy needs a beat to make anything he says weighty. His delivery is always on point, and here are some lyrics to serve as empirical evidence for his skills or whatever: “Tell your bitch to wipe me down / Schoolboy bitch, pistols over cap and gown.” He says “bitch” twice in one rhyme. Damn. That’s that Paul Ryan on abortion type of ruthlessness.

As far as [email protected]!n$ is concerned, I hate spelling the man’s name. And if he’s reading this, here’s a piece of advice: Putting an @ symbol in your name doesn’t make you look “RutHLe$$,” it makes you look like a little girl using her e-mail address for a rap moniker. Now, can the man rhyme? Eh. Depends on who you’re talking to. But I will say that next to Schoolboy he doesn’t exactly look  “RutHLe$$.” (Fuck, I hate spelling that too.) In fact, [email protected]!n$ is looking a little frail — take it however you want it. But I distinctly remember Schoolboy saying, “Bosses get fat and you look thinner.” O yeah, it was on this track. Let us pray for peer editing.

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