November 5, 2012

Max Bell went to Catholic School.

Game has probably never been to a seminary or rocked Franciscan Monk brown. I doubt he says the Rosary before hopping into his Phantom. But his Soundcloud name is “jesuspiece,” both after the popular medallion and in accordance with his upcoming December 11 album, called, (surprise), Jesus Piece. And the artwork for his album looks like it a stained glass trading card for Bloods. But just so no one at the Vatican freaks out, Game isn’t trying to hi-jack the Pope mobile anytime soon. His Twitter handle still reads “Handsome Ass Nigga.”

While “Celebration” did its job as far as capitalizing on the “1st of the Month” sample, one of the most quoted and easily-understood Bone Thugs lyrics next to “I miss my uncle Charles,” and verses from every major Hip-Hop/R&B Top 40 singer (Chris Brown, I guess) and rapper (Wiz, Tyga, and Wayne) except the jorts-clad Aubrey Graham—was it really that hard? “Holy Water,” the new cut from Game’s “Sunday Service” series, sounds only half blessed.

The Sap produced track is the definition of minimal, sparse, bare-bones. The drums are a simple as simple gets. Which would be fine, were the looped and varyingly pitched chants not tired after the first ten seconds. I’m aware that spiritual chants/incantations are supposed to induce a state of meditative hypnosis, but really ask yourself, when was the last time you bumped The Benedictine Monks of Santo Domingo de Silos?

Production aside, Game seems a little scattered on this track. It’s like he’s trying to figure out which temple he wants to deliver his sermon in. Is it the temple of nostalgia, where Game can preach about shit that happened in 92? Is it the temple of sneakers, where Game can clown on sneaker fiends who’ve been shot for their J’s? Or is it the temple of fear, where Game can speculate about what will happen should he lose his voice, and thus, the ability to rap? I have no fucking idea.

Just for the record, aside from Jesus (if you’re a believer), the only other person who may or may not have walked on water is Peter Sellers.

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