June 27, 2017

You can catch Israel Daramola on Twin Peaks, airing each Sunday night on Showtime.

[Ed.- The country seems to be disintegrating at a remarkable pace. Every day brings a fresh deluge of horror. In Alternative Facts, Israel Daramola pauses for a second to look back and take stock of the previous week to ten days. There’s danger in retreating into a shell and letting it wash over you; it’s important to catalogue each new, impossible wrong.]

This week the Senate presented their revised version of the Affordable Health Care bill, and surprise! It’s terrible.

The law is anti-woman, anti-disabled, anti-sick people and just anti-poor in general. Obamacare, for all its faults, was one of the biggest redistributions of wealth from the rich to the poor in American history–and still an incredibly conservative bill. Trumpcare brings tax cuts to the rich and encourages the very dangerous meritocracy attitude that is building in regard to health. Where people treat their health less as a matter of current circumstance that can change any moment (which it is) and more like a state of mind and something 100% controllable in any circumstance (which it isn’t). The Trumpcare health plan is literally a matter of life and death. This is not hyperbole; people are going to die if this thing is enacted. It is important to say this and not mince words. Now is the time to fight the hardest.

In Other News:

Threatening America’s most hated president really should not be more controversial than the physical domestic abuse you almost certainly committed on your ex-girlfriend. Then again we elected moldy pudding that brags about grabbing women by the pussy.

Did you know that for a long time, wives could not be raped according to US law? Being married was considered automatic consent. This is probably the mindset that existed in 1979 when North Carolina ruled in State v. Way that if intercourse has been enacted between two parties, consent cannot be legally revoked. Sen. Jeff Jackson is trying to change this law because he is a human with a soul, I assume. The fact of the matter is regardless of how you personally feel, a person is allowed to change their mind. Women continue to be assaulted and raped at high rates on college campuses and these moving goalposts by lawmakers on what rape is only encourages more confusion. It’s important that we protect our women and not encourage more sexual abuse.

Speaking of which, Bill Cosby and his lawyers, not content with getting way with drugging and raping multiple women, now want to hold town halls on how to avoid sexual assault accusations. Yes, you read that right: how to avoid sex assault ACCUSATIONS. Ignoring the fact that Bill Cosby himself couldn’t avoid accusations, this is more of the victim-blaming bullshit that Cosby has always specialized in by pretending every woman is an evil harlot out to get you. If you ask me, the best way to avoid a sexual assault accusation is to not commit sexual assault.

Why is the NBA draft interesting? I really am trying trying to figure it out. Thursday was promoted as one of the best drafts in years and I was already bored by pick 6. Who wants to watch 19-year-olds become instantly richer than you’ll ever be in your life? The good things about the draft are the jokes on Twitter, bad comparisons from ESPN analysts (Jalen Rose compared a player to a white center from the 1950s that I don’t think any of them have ever seen footage of) and Coach Calipari of Kentucky being a humblebragging blowhard about how great it is to see his players get drafted after 1 year (and it can happen to you to if you come to Kentucky!). The bonus this year I guess was to see Lavar Ball spike the ball at the 1 yard line and go full Vince McMahon about how he knew his son was destined for the Lakers. He even had the Laker edition big baller brand sneakers ready to go the minute Lonzo was drafted; really the best branding synergy since Deray’s vest.

We lost Prodigy of Mobb Deep this week. I don’t have any good stories. The first time I heard “Shook Ones,” I thought it was the hardest song ever. Then I heard “Survival of the Fittest.” Prodigy was one of the most quotable, swaggy and thoughtful dudes in rap. He was the perfect kind of rapper and then became the perfect kind of rap blogger. He was truly a blessing to rap and this world and, as a guy struggling with sickle cell (an uncovered preexisting tradition under Trumpcare by the way), his death hit me close to home. I hope Prodigy is throwing TVs at Jesus in heaven now.

The Best in TV:

Sunday night was the BET awards–the only relevant award show. It was full of everything you could want from a black event: every type of music, a celebration of old school artists Xscape and New Edition, bad sound production, a loud-ass host and a show that ran way too long. The most notable moments were the aforementioned Xscape reunion and New Edition tribute; a performance from Migos with an Affirmative Action performance by Post Malone; Future and Kendrick Lamar performing in a Moulin Rouge set for some reason; and the yearly Chico DeBarge performance. It was a mess and I loved every moment; God bless black people.

Meanwhile, the 8th episode of Twin Peaks was also last night and all the joy amassed during the BET awards was turned into pure terror and nightmare fuel that may or may not have caused a certain writer to keep the lights on and take sleeping pills in order to guarantee sleep. Describing this episode would be meaningless even if you, dear reader, know everything about Twin Peaks. There was a bunch of dirt covered hoboes feeding off a bloody Dale Cooper doppelganger, there was a nuclear blast that turned into a Kubrickian kaleidoscope fantasia sequence, there was a magic orb with the face of Laura Palmer that was transported to earth, the aforementioned dirty vagrant walked to a radio station repeating “gotta light?” at people before crushing their skulls with his hand and then speaking over the airwaves a sinister message that caused people listening to pass out. Also some sort of roach-fly-frog thing crawled into a woman’s mouth. Oh and there was a Nine Inch Nails performance in the middle of it all. I love this terrifying nonsense show so fucking much you guys.

 

 

Enjoy your nightmares! R.I.P Prodigy.