The first draft of this post was vaporized by my computer. When I attempted to restore it, it took me to an all black screen where words started typing themselves out. “Passion of the Weiss,” it read, “you have entered the matrix. Take the white pill.” Then the screen flashed and it took me to another dark screen. “You have made a terrible mistake. Do not try to do this again.” Then it took me to a third chamber. “Danger, go back.” I immediately closed the browser and prowled through my luggage searching for white pills. I assume they meant an Adderall. Who am I to argue with such ominous and vague representatives of the Illuminati?

The funniest part about this is that I am not making any of this up. I have no idea what to make of what just happened. The only possible explanation is that this Killer Mike video is that powerful and horrifying. I will be barricading myself in my hotel room for the next 17 hours. If you never hear from me again, call Keanu. He will know what to do.

Song below the jump.