Slava Pastuk wishes you would try to play him something better.

What exactly does DJ Khaled do? I think that’s a valid question that requires an explanation.  “Get money” isn’t an acceptable answer. Although his name has been attached to dozens of street anthems in the last five years, most of them prominently mentioning the word “hood”, I’m still not completly sure what Khaled’s role is in creating them. Officially, he “co-produces” all of these songs, but if you’ve watched any of his video blogs (you have, haven’t you?!) then it seems that his ‘producing’ consists of bringing artists together in a studio, taking pictures for instagram, hanging out for a while, hearing the near-finished version of a song, and then contributing some attention-grabbing vocals before telling the real producer where to put them. Is “Motivational Curator” a job-title in the rap game?

Quincy Jones-Khaled blesses us with an attempt at another summer jam in “Wish You Would” with the help of Hit-Boy’s 808 assisted, nightmare-arcade inspired production; Rick Ross’ expectedly-lethargic lyrics about shooting people and having to catch the bus; and Kanye West calling back the whiny auto-tune that we hoped he had left behind in 2008, along with his dreams of becoming a mentor to Kid Cudi. Don’t worry, I’m sure Big Sean’s situation is different. “Wish You Would” is the second single off Khaled’s “Kiss The Ring” album; the first being (the now ironically titled) “Take It To The Head”, which recieved a tepid reception outside of #TeamBreezy and #TeamFuckPeterRosenberg.

Will anyone be excited enough about this single to proclaim it the 2012 version of “I’m On One”? Maybe. But that person is probably DJ Khaled. On paper, a combination of two of the most dominant MC’s in rap with the producer-rapper-producer who created the biggest beat of 2011 should make for a contender of a song. Instead, we get a disheartened record that leaves you feeling unsatisfied after the 4 minutes is over. This is the best?

Download:
MP3: DJ Khaled ft. Kanye West & Rick Ross – “I Wish You Would”