Doc Zeus ain’t supposed to do this shit, but he forgets There is something ironically apropos that the best professional promotion that 50 Cent’s career has enjoyed in years is a gravely errant first pitch delivered at a Mets game. 50’s mockable, misfiring fast ball might have missed the catcher’s mitt but 50 found himself […]
Has-Lo is not a Boy Scout; he’ll air your ass out. 50 Cent is too successful. No one wants to champion that. People love the chase. The come up is the mirror to the chase. When the listener can live vicariously through your chase, the listener is excited like young love. When the artist achieves […]
I’ve spent a significant part of the last few years taking the death of gangster rap for granted. The narrative that I’ve run with tracks the rise in popularity of artists like (duh) Kanye West, the explicitly fake Rick Ross, and Drake, and the concurrent fall of Young Jeezy, the disappearance of 50 Cent, the […]
50 Cent Tries to Hold On March 17, 2014
Harold Stallworth steers clear of candy shops and amusement parks. Last month, somewhere about Valentine’s Day, 50 Cent announced his departure from Interscope Records via press release. After a nearly decade-long tenure on the affluent label, he’s finally taking his G-Unit imprint independent with the help of Caroline Distribution. Things look bleak for the crack […]
Harold Stallworth has been fascinated with Queens since Coming to America. Has there ever been a superstar rapper as cold as 50 Cent? In the twilight of his career, he’s as famous and rich as any of his Forbes contemporaries, but interest in his music has clearly waned—even the once ubiquitous “In The Club” has […]
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Deen is not easily amused, except when he is. Hey! It’s new 50 Cent. Wow. Say what you want about the man – and there’s a lot to say if you’re so inclined – but you can’t say that he doesn’t love music. He keeps trying and trying and trying! He clearly doesn’t have to, […]
By Deen
Deen has never watched the X Factor. Well, if it isn’t the Hail Mary to end all Hail Marys. If you’d told me back in 2006 that I’d fuck with a rap single with Adam Levine on the hook, I’d have called your mom a whore and told you to suck a bag of phalluses. […]
By Deen
Max Bell ghostwrites for Lil Mouse. 50 Cent’s voice is golden. No, it’s nickel-plated. Strike that too. 50 Cent’s voice is hot lead from a nine-millimeter — probably because some of said nine-millimeter lead  remains lodged in his oral cavity.  Whatever the case, every once in a while, his voice hits me straight in the […]
Deen loves you like a overweight adolescent adores pastry. For a guy that’s always seemed to “get it” – “it” being how to ransack the rap industry for all its worth, Fif doesn’t seem to get it anymore. The Lost Tape is YET ANOTHER collection of great 50 Cent songs that’ll probably get largely ignored […]
By Deen
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POSTED IN The El-P remix of Justin Bieber has caused me to squander valuable time deliberating which unlikely combination and sampled “Bitch” hook is superior. As this is the Internet, people will pretend that it is not a legitimate question, but it is. There is no way that a Too Short, E-40, and 50 Cent album […]